This is a really huge dilemma I'm facing now. I'm really really at a loss on what to do, what to say tomorrow.
You can't have the cake and eat it. How apt. I've been balancing this act for 2 years. Year one was a breeze, with no worries at all. Now is not the case anymore. It is almost impossible for me to feel like that again.
After the first incident, guilt starts piling up and it dawn onto me that I am being a huge disappointment to two very important persons of my life. I know that as long as I continue to keep this under wraps, that barrier between me and them will never be gone.
But it is so not easy to let go and forget everything. The one who provides emotional support at my lowest. The one who I can talk to about almost everything under the sun. The one who I can really be myself with. The one who appreciates everything about me. The one who is really my best friend and everything else.